We are not meant to live in isolation. What makes us healthy and whole is the connections we form with one another. With our families. Our friends. Our colleagues and our community… The thing we need the most to feel healthy has become harder to get.
After more than 30 years in the field of social work, I know one thing to be true. We do not need to be victims to our situation. We have choices to make, each and every day about how we want to live our lives. How we choose to show up for ourselves and each other.
Practice #3 - Reach Out
For a number of years I’ve been taking groups of young people to Central America to do volunteer work. At the end of the trip, the students are surprised by how the experience impacted them. “I wanted to give to others,” they say, “But I feel like I got more than I gave.”
Each of us possess something called mirror neurons. Mirror neurons activate when we see someone else experiencing an emotion, allowing us to feel with the other person, a process we call empathy. Empathy is at the root of connection. When our mirror neurons activate, we connect with the person we are talking to. And it doesn’t end there.
When we feel, powerful chemicals are released in our brain. Those chemicals, called neurotransmitters, in turn affect our emotions. That’s why volunteering feels so good to us. When we reach out to others, to offer kindness, compassion or generosity, their appreciation, joy, gratitude, happiness, etc., is reflected back to us, activating our neural process. That’s what make us feel better. Reaching out to others is reciprocal.
Try This - Look for ways to reach out to the people around you. Start small. Make eye contact with the people you see in your day. The woman walking her dog on the opposite side of the street. The postal worker who sorts your mail. The checker at the grocery story. Smile. Say hello. “How are you holding up?,” you might ask.
Call your mother. Your sister. Your aunt. Activate your mirror neurons. Use the connections in your life to be with others.
image from here.
